29-year-old man posted about his interracial marriage on Reddit.
Here’s the full story
I’m a 29 year old white guy. My wife is 30 and black. We have two kids, a 3 year old girl and a 5 year old boy.
My wife got pregnant with our son early in our relationship. We had only been together a year. We got married because she got pregnant. Fortunately for us, we are actually happy.
When my son was born I accepted him as mine. However, I couldn’t help noticing how little he looked like me.
He is noticeably darker than my wife. He doesn’t look half white. My family and friends have asked if I’m sure he’s mine. I had doubts, but I initially decided to trust my wife. I loved my son regardless.
When our son was 2, my wife had our daughter. I had no doubt she’s mine. She looks just like me, she even has my blue eyes.
I never realized how powerful it is to know a child is yours. I bonded with her easier because there wasn’t the question of paternity dangling over our heads.
My family bonded with her faster too. Her resemblance to me convinced me that my son is not mine.
I tried to always treat them equally as I see them both as my children. But I realized I was beginning to resent my son. It felt unfair that I had to care for someone else’s child. I also began to resent my wife because I felt she had betrayed me. I finally got a paternity test in secret.
I was relieved to learn that my son is in fact mine. Genetics are weird. Anyways, that was 4 months ago and my relationship with my wife and son improved dramatically. I feel much closer to him now that I know he’s mine. My wife and I have been so happy that we were talking about a third child.
I confessed to my wife I got a paternity test. I hated keeping the secret and I thought she would understand given how much he doesn’t look like me. She flipped out.
She asked me if I ever doubted our daughter, and when I said no she called me racist. It’s not true. I didn’t prefer my daughter because of her whiter features, I just knew she was mine. She also said that I made our son feel unloved for no reason for all those years. I said that’s bull.
Even when I didn’t believe my son was mine, I treated him as though he were. My wife says she wants to move out and take our children after the quarantine.
It’s been about a week and a half and I’m still on the sofa. I hoped she would’ve calmed down by now but things haven’t changed. She’s just so furious with me for not trusting her and for in her eyes, denying my son because he’s dark.
She barely talks to me unless it’s about the kids. I don’t want to lose my family. Here’s where I turn to you, Reddit. Is it so awful that I had doubts? I still took care of him. I don’t understand why something like this is wrecking my marriage. I think she is overreacting.
